Insanity!!!

Oh my heavens! What an incredible time we had! The picture shown above is all of us girls kicking off our night at Tin Lizzy's in Buckhead. I began writing this blog yesterday but didn't have the energy to finish it - mainly because I thought I was going to be sick and I couldn't focus on any one thing for more than 15 seconds at a time (try prepping to teach a Math class on a Monday morning in this condition). Nonetheless, I hope you get a few laughs and enjoy the pictures. It was truly a night I will never forget...oh crap, I forgot that I had forgotten some of it. Ok, well, what I remember was AWESOME (which luckily IS most of it!)! And here it is!

However, notice above there is a man with an open shirt. Let this serve as a warning: the pictures you are about to view in no way reflect the morals and values of those in them! :-P It was a wild time, the drinks were flowing, and I can't believe this used to be a typical Saturday night for me - well, minus the stripper!

Before we headed out, I was lucky enough to get ready in style with Bridesmaid Lindsay and my soon-to-be-'sister' Sonia at the St. Regis Hotel in Buckhead. Amazing room, amazing view, champagne, cupcakes...what more could a girl ask for??

Oh yeah, a ride in a Bentley!!! I'd like to call this picture, 'Bride in Bentley with Giant Pimp Cup'. At this point, the Pimp Cup is still empty, but not for long...

We made it to Tin Lizzy's somewhat late (hey, it took me awhile to look like my most fabulous self!) and everyone looked amazing and beautiful. I sat down to chips and some delicious guacamole, queso, salsa and about a quart of margarita poured for me into my giant Lil' Jon cup. All the ladies wore black dresses and sunglasses. The theme of the night was "Mission: Impossible". Inside pink and black balloons were missions for each of us. I've seen people do this stuff at bars for bachelorette parties and always thought it was lame, but I found it HILARIOUS when it was us doing it! My mission was to "Get a cute guy's phone number and call it standing next to him." This was accomplished using Bridesmaid Tatum's phone since I carried literally nothing with me all night - well, except the Lil' Jon cup.

Some of my favorite missions were "Walk up to a guy and tell him how much you love your booty" (M.O.H. Nicole had this one and she ROCKED it). "Put lipstick on a guy" (Poor Megan, this guy had to be restrained by his friends in order for her to accomplish her mission, but she did it!). "Stand up and start screaming, 'Why is everything always about HER!?'" (Bridesmaid Tatum had this one, and since she was sitting next to me, it was SO funny!) But the winner of my favorite mission of the night was Sonia's mostly because of how she accomplished it. Her mission was to tell a guy a dirty joke. Simple enough, but none of had dirty jokes. Except Tatum. (Because I'm no longer drunk, there is no way I'm typing out the joke. Ask me about it sometime because the way Sonia did this was seriously one of the funniest things I've ever seen in my life.) It was a two-line joke and Sonia picked this innocent-looking guy at the bar. He was so sweet that he didn't even seem to get it which resulted in Sonia having to emphatically tell him what it meant. It was priceless.

Emily had to get a guy to show her his muscles - wow, did she pick the right guy, or what?!? Thank you, Emily. Thank you.

Below, M.O.H. Nicole is getting the news that she will be shouting from the rooftops how much she loves her derriere.

Sonia telling her joke. I wish I could write it here, I do. Just thinking about the delivery of it makes me laugh.

I think I'm giving a thumbs-up there, even though that could possibly be me dancing (more than likely it's a thumbs-up!).

My Atlanta- (and Fayetteville, NC!)-based bridesmaids. We were on our mission!

All of us girls outside Tin Lizzy's - even though I'm not sure why we took the picture facing away from Tin Lizzy's (we're in front of Tin Lizzy's, but we're facing it instead of having it behind us). It's entirely possible none of us realized the little sense this made. But it's still a cute pic!

Landry, Landry, Landry! My favorite comic! He bought me my first shot of the night - which really was more like a drink (You can't see the size of that thing in the picture, but it was HUGE!). So I had to drink it like a drink - remember, a marathon, not a sprint.

The comedy club was so awesome. We got to see lots of funny comedians! I'd like to think we were pretty darn funny ourselves given that we didn't stop talking to them through their sets. In normal conditions, I think we would've gotten kicked out. But we were 11 women dolled to the nines and drinking lots, so hahaha, we got away with it! And on another note, I'd like to give my Award for the Drunkest Person of the Evening. Right now you're probably thinking, "Tomboy Bride, that HAD to be you. You're the Bride!" No, my friends, in fact, the Award goes to someone who wasn't even affiliated with our party. The title was taken from me by a girl sitting at the next table over with her boyfriend (oh wait, I guess her fiance). The first comic took the stage, congratulated me on my upcoming marriage, to which we heard, "I'M GETTING MARRIED TOO!!!" Our table of ladies responded, "Oh, that's great, congratulations." "SEPTEMBER 25TH, WE'RE GETTING MARRIED!"

"Wow, ok, Congratulations," the comic said. "I've got 5 minutes, ladies, I've gotta do my show...Does anyone here have a really embarrassing tattoo?" "HE HAS A CENTAUR ON HIS ASS!" The Girl from the Other Table yelled, pointing at her future-husband. The comic continued, but instead all you heard was, "A HALF-A CENTAUR! HIS BROTHER HAS THE OTHER HALF, HE'S IN THE MILITARY. WE'RE GETTING MARRIED!" Awesome. I loved it. I think her fiance ended up carrying her out of there. So funny. Back to pictures...

Bridesmaid Tami and me! We had the bright idea on Friday night when Tami came in from Fayetteville to drink 2 1/2 bottles of wine and stay up talking til 4am. I'm not exactly sure where we re-connected with our 22-year-old selves, but I'm STUNNED we still managed to stay up til 6am Bachelorette night. Crazy.

All the girls with Comedian Dan.

And me with an empty Pimp Cup...

But I recovered, adjusted my veil, and we were off to Club Havana!!!

Tatum, me, Megan, and Sonia - whoo-hoo, let's dance!

A great picture of Sonia and Mary Beth!

Bridesmaid Tatum - such a character.

Yes, I'm all squinty. I may have had a few drinks (read: about a gallon of margaritas). I can't believe I actually used to do this on a weekly basis.

Everyone looked so pretty. Pictured here: Christine, Megan, Nicole, Tatum, and Emily.

Oh boy, I think Nicole was getting ready to watch the entertainment! I don't know when this started but all of a sudden there was a dude with his shirt open placing me in a chair (the previously pictured gentleman at the beginning of the blog). He was hilarious. And I say hilarious because my reaction to male strippers is sheer laughter (yes, the one other time I've seen them). I don't know if it's a reaction out of being embarrassed or what, but I covered my face and screamed. Too funny.

Some final pictures: A nice picture of Bridesmaid Tami and M.O.H. Nicole. In the last two pictures of me, I'm not certain if I'm disliking the fact that my margaritas were replaced with vodka (I would NEVER dislike this, so I'm not sure why I'm making this face) or if my body was staging a coup and trying to get me to spit out any further adult beverages. I do look fierce though. What would Tyra say? Oh, and P.S., notice I no longer have a veil. This may also be the portion of the night where I lost my shoes (Thank gosh Tatum and E have them!)

And there you have it. The morning after was painful (especially since I woke up so early). Bryan was on his way home from North Carolina where he spent the weekend for our friend Frank's bachelor party. So I didn't even have him there to take care of me! Tami was there to moan and groan with me, though, and we made it through the day. My stomach still wasn't super happy with me this morning, but after some Starbucks this morning and Wendy's for lunch, I feel back on track. I'm ready to do it all again in 2 weeks in Philly!!!